In a discussion in my workshop this week, the topic of shame came up. We shared how easy it is for us to feel that we somehow don’t measure up, are not good enough or worthy enough, whether it is in our profession, as a Mom or Dad, as a friend, as a wife or husband, or even in our hobbies.
The crazy part is that we all feel some degree of “not being enough” at some point in our lives. At different points in my life I have felt that I wasn’t accomplished enough in my work, not outgoing and outspoken enough around others, not skilled enough in my dancing, etc.
And I have talked to countless women who all struggled with their own “imperfections” while trying to look like they had it all together. So if we are all trying to pretend that we don’t have any problems, weaknesses, or failures, then is there really anybody left to lead the perfect life we are striving for?
Our society places all sorts of social expectations on us: who we “should” be, how we “should” behave, what we “should” achieve, etc. But blaming society achieves nothing. It is our responsibility to choose whether we want to follow these unrealistic expectations and pretend to be perfect OR to live a “real” life that has ups and downs, includes room for mistakes, and allows us to be imperfect.
Once we accept and embrace ourselves just as we are, we are able to be authentic and be our real selves. And that allows us to accept and connect much more with others and bring more love, joy and happiness into our lives.
For more information on being imperfect, check out my previous article about Brené Brown’s beautiful book: “The Gifts of Imperfection.”