I believe that it all comes back to your relationship with yourself. If you truly accept and love yourself – your mind, your body, your soul – then nothing anyone else says can hurt you. If someone says you are too big or too short, it doesn’t matter – because you know you are perfect the way you are. If someone says that you are stupid, clumsy, too much, inconsiderate, or too different, it doesn’t matter – because you know that there is nothing wrong with you and you love yourself the way you are. The only reason something hurts us is if we believe that it is true.
But if we think that we are perfect the way we are, how will we grow and continue to develop? And aren’t we all imperfect and have “flaws?” Yes, of course we all have things that we may want to work on. And that’s ok. But don’t hold out on loving yourself, just because you haven’t reached a certain ideal yet. If we love ourselves, it doesn’t mean that we stop to grow. It actually makes it easier to change because we are being compassionate with ourselves and are using positive reinforcement as opposed to criticizing and blaming ourselves and using negative reinforcement. (Find out more about self-compassion in Self-Judgment or Self-Compassion?)